Mr Harmonixer
by Vicarious Lurker
Summary: (Covenant)The Stud Card collection actually has a special edition. Ever wondered who really is Mr. Harmonixer?


**Shadow Hearts – Mr. Harmonixer**

- - - -

It wasn't long after Yuri gave Alice's picture to Pierre Magimel that his friends learned there's another side of the Fusionist that they didn't see or know.

It started one sunny day at the Yokohama Streets, when people thought there couldn't be any mischief or weird happenings for the day. The puppeteer Gepetto who was out for a morning walk, saw Pierre Magimel waved at him, indicating him to come closer to the Magimel wagon. Gepetto stepped closer to the tailor, and thought Pierre's creative grin that appeared every time he succeeded at designing a dress was tugging at the corner of his lips. He was right, and wrong at the same time.

"My, what a lovely morning isn't it, Gepetto?" Pierre cooed at him.

"It certainly is. Did something good just happen?" Gepetto asked.

Gerard, Pierre's twin sighed heavily. "His creative juices flowed last night, and guess what? He spent an all-nighter whipping your Cornelia a cute little number."

Gepetto was amused. "Really? I thought you're out of ideas, since Yuri haven't find any new Stud Cards for you."

"Oh, that Blue Virgin dress is sooo cute, isn't it!" Pierre squealed. "But believe me when I say, it's my second best dress."

"Second best… you mean, you've come up with a new dress?" Gepetto queried him excitedly, happy that the _battery recharging_ period was finally over.

Pierre nodded furiously. "And that, my friend, is all thanks to this beloved Stud Card!" He produced a Card from his pocket, securely wrapped in plastic and gave it a long, passionate smooch.

"Well, I see." Gepetto said, realizing that he had unconsciously stepped back from the tailor. "Can I see the new dress?" He asked politely.

"Why, of course!" Pierre giggled, slapping the puppeteer's butt playfully. Gepetto stepped back again. He wished that he has Yuri's reflexes sometimes, and dodged the Magimels' misplaced hands at the right time.

The tailor placed Cornelia at the wagon's back, and Pierre announced, "Presenting…the latest creation from my 1915 Pierre Magimel Collection," he took a dramatic deep breath before pulling the curtains. "I call it…Neutrally Nude!"

Gepetto felt his eyes jumping out from their socket the moment the curtains opened and Cornelia spun with a delicate swing in front of him, and covered her bare body with her tiny fingers.

"Look at her, so pure, untainted, and ready to pawn at her enemies!" Pierre gave off a long sigh, and his cheeks glowed a radiant pink. "What do you think, Gepetto, isn't she cute? With that ravishing smile, every monster will bow down before her! This is…" Pierre stopped to wipe a happy tear from the corner of his eye, "truly my masterpiece."

_What the-? _Gepetto thought, confused. _The man-er, half-man won't get away with this! It's true that Cornelia's just a doll, but for the love of God, she's modeled after his own daughter! Surely __Pierre__ knew about this?_

"I won't let my Cornelia walked around the battlefield naked! And you call this a _masterpiece_? She's not even wearing a dress!" Gepetto bellowed.

For a moment Pierre Magimel stood there, jaw slightly dropping at Gepetto. "You can't appreciate art, you old goat!"

Their screaming apparently had invited onlookers, and it wasn't long before Yuri and the others found them. (Gepetto with a swollen eye and Pierre with bruised lips).

Yuri looked at both of them, and tried very hard to stifle a laugh. "What's the matter?"

"The old goat won't appreciate my work of art!"

"He violated my Cornelia!"

Both men shouted at the same time.

Yuri looked around in confusion, and understanding dawned on his face after Joachim pointed a naked Cornelia inside the Magimel's wagon.

"Ohhh…" The fusionist nodded sagely. "Well, you shouldn't let a small matter like this bother you any lon-"

"This is NOT a small matter!" They shouted in unison again, and Yuri cringed at their shrillness.

"But I didn't see a dress," Lucia said, removing Cornelia from the wagon.

"Hmph!" Pierre said loudly. "You brute people won't understand a work of art, even when it's under your very nose!"

"This…nakedness, I mean," Karin pointed feebly at the doll, too afraid to ask and dreadful for the answer. "Is your new work?"

"Yes!" Pierre shouted proudly.

Anastasia gave the doll a quick glance and narrowed her eyes to Pierre. "You're a sick old man."

"Well, don't blame my artistic side," The tailor said with his nose up in the air. "I'm just inspired by this gorgeous card over here," He waved the Card he kissed earlier. Kurando saw Yuri's who was laughing earlier, has suddenly drained out of healthy colors. He wasn't fusing, right? Or is it Jeanne calling him again?

Yuri moved with a lightning speed and quickly grabbed the Card away from Pierre's prying hands. Unfortunately for him, Pierre was faster, as the tailor rapidly took the card away.

"No way! You gave this card to me, and I'm not giving it to anyone! It's MINE! All Mine!" Pierre hollered, clutching the card like it was his first born.

Karin and Anastasia eyed Yuri suspiciously. "What's wrong with the Card, Yuri?" Lucia asked him slyly.

"It's none of your business!" Yuri went to grab the card again, but this time Blanca had bit the Card away from Pierre's grip.

"Good boy! Bring it here, Blanca!" Anastasia cried.

But Yuri caught the wolf's tail before it had the chance to run to the princess. Blanca threw the card away with all his strength, and it landed perfectly…in Karin's hands.

"Karin, No! Don't look!" Yuri shrieked desperately.

Anastasia and the others quickly gathered around the red-head, and saw her jaw dropped.

It was the Special Edition of Stud Card, and the picture of Yuri covered **only** in his Periapt pendant, were shown.

_The fusionist, Yuri Hyuga.__ This Japanese-Russian man had saved the world once, and bestowed with the nickname 'God slayer' by a Secret Society. "I've turned from your typical bad boy to a real psycho," Said the man with multiple souls within him. _

"Ewww!" Anastasia covered her face, but she continued to peek through her fingers. "Yuri, you-you're ---sick!"

"Oh, my," Lucia gasped, though she seemed very amused.

Joachim gathered the courage to look, and found himself blushing.

Gepetto couldn't find a word to say.

Blanca yawned, and began scratching the back of his ear.

Kurando looked away to find his cousin crouching next to the Magimel wagon.

Karin, slowly looked up from the picture and tried her hardest to fight the furious tears from falling. She slowly walked in front of the Harmonixer, and Yuri pressed his face to his knees. "When?"

"…"

"Answer me." Karin's voice was barely a whisper, but even Blanca could sense the anger in it.

"…Veronica. Detention cells in St. Margarete island." Yuri answered finally.

"Why?"

"A man at Cannes said that I have what it takes to become a model."

"And the pendant should cover enough?"

Yuri's face shot up and he looked at Karin furiously. "It was against my will, okay! I didn't want to do it, but that crazy S & M broad said that she'll kill all of you if I don't!"

"Oh, please," Lucia giggled. "I bet you enjoyed every moment of being her _slave_." She said, emphasizing heavily on the last word.

"Shaddup!"

"I don't want you to do this anymore, do you hear?"

"…'kay." Yuri said under his breath.

Karin cleared her throat. "I can't hear you."

"Geez, okay, mom!"

Out from the corner of her eyes, Karin saw Pierre advanced toward her with a pleading look in his eyes. "Miss Koenig…can I have the Card back?" The tailor whimpered.

The woman turned from Yuri, and fixed her nicest smile on Pierre. "Here you go, Pierre," She handed him the Card. "But you have to promise me one thing."

"Y-yes, Miss Koenig?"

"Don't show it to anyone else," She smiled. "And call me Karin."

Karin never let Yuri out of her sight ever since the Stud Card incident. But they heard of rumors that the Card Company had received a very notable amount of request for Mr. Harmonixer.

They even heard that there're other Special Editions of Stud Cards, such as Mr. Wrestler 2 and Mr. Harmonixer 2. Mr. Wrestler 2 was the champion of man Festival and known as the 'environmentally-friendly hero' with a temp room IQ, and Mr. Harmonixer 2 with his dashing red loincloth has a big manly sword that he uses to swing around.

But whether the Stud Card Company planned to release their other Special Editions or not, that's another story.

**THE END**

**Author's Note**: the _Neutrally Nude_ dress really existed in the Japanese version of SH:C. It got cut of for raunchiness, I guess. But the dress' name is purely invented by yours truly.


End file.
